Saturday, April 02, 2005

The worst day of my life

So anyway, youre all probablys wondering what happened at Brian's birthday party the other night. We were all supposed to meet up at Pizza Hut for a meal and then go on to the fabulous local nightclub "Climax" after. Well that was the plan but I decided that my hair was a right mess so I needed to put blonde streaks in it and so I ended up being three hours late and missed the Pizza Hut thing. Then I had a bit of text sex with this guy on gaydar and stuff and so it wasn't until about midnight when I got to Climax (got to Climax - get it!!!! So hilarious)

I'd also decided to dump Brian after giving him his present, cos 30 is really too old for me and I don't do old. Except I forgot his stupid Harry Potter book so I was just going to say "Happy Birthday Beeyotch" and then like dump him when I got there.

But you'd never guess what. I got there and it took me ages to find him and Debbie and Miss Thing and Barbara were all like giggling in the corner and acting really stupid and drunk and they wouldn't say where Brian was. I guessed he might be in the loos as he has a weak bladder and needs to take a piss about once every 30 minutes. So I went in there and CUNT! He was snogging Keith!!!!!!!!!!!! My best freind kissing my boyfreind.

It turns out that their both in a relationship now and (I can't bring myself to say this) *I* have been dumped by a 30 year old. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! There is like, no worse disgrace. Anyway, I let out a scream that brought everyone running and then we had this big showdown - I attacked them both and was crying, and slipped on the wet floor and hurt my head, and then Debbie came in and thumped everyone and dragged everyone outside, and Miss Thing started screaming (I don't know why - probably cos no-one was giving her any attention) and Barbara pissed herself andwe all have been barred for 2 weeks.

Anyway, I have had a day to calm down and now I will have my revenge. I want you all to know that Keith has a photo of his own Dad wearing just swimming trunks and he keeps it with his gay porn stash. Gross or what. No wonder he's with a pensioner like Brian. And as for Brian - well, what can I say? He likes people to wee on him and wear frilly women's knickers.

I have plenty more to tell about both of them, but am far too upset to write any more tonight. All I can say is that I am like devasted and my life will never be the same again.


At 1:14 PM, Blogger Jon said...

Awww poor Jamie!

*hugs you to make you feel better*

That is shocking behaviour and you did NOTHING to deserve being dumped so harshly as that.

God - being dumped by a 30 year old - how embarrasing for you. :(

At 10:28 PM, Blogger William John said...

I reckon that Keith is only doing it to hurt you coz he wants you. Noone with any mind would go with a 30 yo if they didn't have to, right?


William John.


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