Jamie4U

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Hello World

OK, so like, everyone I know is always saying to me, "Jamie, you're life is so amazing, you should really write a book about all the experiences you've had," And ya know what, they're right. I should really be charging you £6.99 or something to even read my words of wisdom, but because I'm such a giver, you can have it all for nothing.

I'm hoping though, that someone will read this and realise how great I am, and fall in love with me - because I do have a lot to offer, and I don't think there's anyone left in a 60 mile radius who I haven't had sex with (and most of them were right mingers and slags). So maybe the internet will help me find someone who I can have a wonderful long-term relationship with (I am hoping to beat my current record of 5 weeks).

First, a bit about myself. My name is Jamie, but you can call me Jamie4U. I am 19 (God I'm so old - I feel like killing myself) and I am GAY, OUT and PROUD. So don't come with your homophobia with me because Jamie4U is like a gay safe space OK? I am just a normal, down-to-earth guy, whos looking for something similar (if you're over 21, have more than a 30 inch waist then I'm not interested - you can FUCK OFF OK!!! Sorry but I get loads of ugly mingers emailing me). I'm straight-acting - I'm sorry but I can't stand queeny, camp guys - they're just not my cup of tea. My many hobbies include karoake (I do a great Madonna routine), Christina Agilariea (I maintain the best fan website on Christina on the whole internet), being popular (everyone wants to be my best friend - keep reading and you will too). I also cut my own hair (every day), and have a complicated beauty regime, which takes up a lot of my spare time.

I currently work in Asda, doing a variety of jobs there (stacking shelves, doing the tills when they are busy), but it is only for the time being and I am just killing time until I am spotted by a talent scout and whisked off to somewhere exciting like Manchester to be a top model, pop star or tv presenter. Everyone I know says that will happen (and my horoscope says it too - I am a Gemini by the way - although I'm not two-faced).

My best friend in the whole world is called Debbie. She's currently on a diet (getting over Christmas - she gained like 3 stone - poor bitch). She also works at Asda and we have a right laugh together. I think she fancied me at first, but now she knows I am gay she is kewl with it, and we tell each other everything about sex. Well, I tell her what I get up to (she doesn't get many fellas unfortunately - so I show her my cock once a month so she won't forget what one looks like). My other friend is called Keith - he's a bit boring really (he won't mind me saying this - hi Keith!) and just trails along everywhere after me. I just put up with him because he has a car and can take me on nights out to Preston and Blackpool.

I also have a "boyfriend" called Brian. I say "boyfriend" because he's not really my boyfriend, but more someone who I let have sex with every now and again, and he's always buying me presents and stuff. He's like 30, or something - old enough to be my grand-dad, he's practically bald for god sake! Anyway, he's the only person I know who has his own flat (it overlooks B&Q's car park, you can't miss it). I keep dumping him, but then he always gets round me by taking me on holiday etc. Still, if something better were to come along... you never know unless ya ask me.

Anyway, I'm exhausted after dictating all of this to Keith to type in, and I'm off down our great local gay pub "Climax" in a minute, so I'll keep you posted. Seeya!

2 Comments:

At 2:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

DEAREST "JAMIE4U", I MUST ADMIT YOUR COMMENTARY IS HILLARIOUS, IF NOT TOTALLY ABSURD AND CHILDISH. YOU HAVE A GREAT DEAL OF POTENTIAL LITTLE PRINCESS BUT IF YOU PLAN TO RULE YOU MUST START TO GROW UP AND MATURE... YOUR OBNOXIOUS WEAKNESS IS THE SELFISHNESS...IF YOU WANT A SINCERE RELATIONSHIP TREAT PEOPLE AS HUMAN BEINGS. YOU MUST BE ONE INSECURE PHYSICAL PERSON NOT TO POST A PICTURE (EVEN FULLY CLOATHED) AFTER THE VERBAL ATTACKS IN REGARD TO OTHERS WEIGHT...WHAT DO YOU REALLY WEIGH...THREE HUNDRED POUNDS??? THANKS FOR AN ADOLESCENT GUT LAUGH!!!! DANIEL WADE

 
At 2:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jamie4U, You are one sweet slut! Wanted your blooming wanger in my mouth until you let me know about the STD...or STD's??? Fun to read/made me flog my big 21 year old cock. thanx!

 

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